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As far as playing, a quick look at Kriegspiel did not show any innovative ways to avoid the referee. The only other option, I think, would be the 'honor system', whereby players exchanging moves by e-mail would not only exchange visible moves, but also masked moves using three separate text files, one for each board. The masked moves files, though, would be 'off-limits' to the opponent (unless he cheats) until the end of the game. At that time, both players can verify that all the masked moves were executed correctly. The other option would be to record the masked moves without exchanging them, trusting that the players will not alter the files surrepticiously. Of course, if you can't trust your opponent, why play chess, right? That's the beauty of chess! FIDE not withstanding!